true christmas spirit

i have just come back for the holidays having been away for a year, and what i have seen so far is that the christmas spirit in my native country has been such a put-on being done by politicians and entertainment celebrities as well as TV shows much like a routine than something from the heart.

it has made me sad an miss the days of old when i was young and christmas meant something.
but my belief in the christmas spirit was brought back to life and it had given me hope, this i saw from the eyes and lovcing heart of my 10 year old daughter.

on christmas day during our reunion with my in-laws, my daughter went out to the town plaza with her cousins and came back bearing small trinkets as gifts for her younger cousins, no one told her to do it and she spent whatever money she had on her, personal money she got as gifts.

i could see the love in her eyes as well as the happines and joy she had being able to give something and seeing the smiles on her cousins faces.

that to me was the true essence of christmas.

waiting again

It’s been a month since I have returned, and I am starting to get bored. I do have some job offers but I am still waiting. Don’t get me wrong I am happy to be back, happy to see my kids and family….but the feeling of being empty and worthless is there again.

 

It is quite hard to be staring at the TV the whole day, you can only watch so much TV. Your day becomes a routine and there is only so much change you could do without having to go out and spend.

 

You lose your drive and motivation, I had set-up myself to study a different language, it will come in handy when I get back…..the problem is I can’t get myself to start doing it.

 

All my friends are at work and I am literally alone.

 

I just hate waiting…..but there is nothing else for me to do.

 

the next michael jordan

i just finished browsing through the net wondering why Kobe Bryant changed his number from #8 to #24....well he has his reasons. but i was amased at how other people think or assume why he did. the thing that got to me the most was, and still is, is the "heir apparent " theory. that Kobe is the next Michael Jordan....thus the #24 after Jordan's #23.

let's face it...there will never be another Michael Jordan for several reasons.....professionalism, attitude and PASSION.

kobe may have exceptional moves but it is nothing that can change the way the game has been played. some say if the game was on the line, they would definitely go to Kobe (he with several buzzer beaters under his belt)...but he is not the only player who can do this. others have done this. what kobe lacks is the professionalism and attitude to be as near great as Jordan. for one he can't work with another superstar...remember him and Shaq. so with that said kobe will be great but wont live up or come even close to Jordan.

there are others who are being compared with Jordan, another player who comes to mind is Lebron James....come on..Lebron?? again he lacks the attitude and the passion and most specially the professionalism....you don't hold out till the last day to sign your contract trying to hold out for more money. with that move you have just shot professionalism and attitude down the drain. and most specially the passion. some even ask for lower salaries in the desire to help and win.

Dwayne Wade, another great player, but then again he always forgets the word - TEAM. we know he can shoot and get to the basket but to extend yourself all season long without using your teammates takes a toll on you. 2 years ago they could have won it if not for his injuries. you can't take a whole team on your own.

The player that i can think of that would come very close to Jordan would be Grant Hill, he had the passion, the attitude and the professionalism, but he also had the injuries. If he had more injury free seasons than what he had he would have been great, but his career in the NBA has been cut short due to injuries. He would also have been a better player if he had a better team to work with.

So that is my personal take on it....i may be wrong but these are just my thoughts.

I love this game!

the next step

so here i am waiting again for the next step....i really don't like
waiting....good thing i have a lot of patience. well nothing much i
can do about it...i have no control over a lot of things.

in the meantime i have to make good use of the time i have, read the
books i missed, get in touch with friends i haven't spoken to in a
long while and do those things i want to do.

i know things happen for a reason and i patiently wait for my time.

it should be Fall by now....and other stuff

 

..as gloomy as fall season starts, it is a welcome respite fro the summer heat. we had a good summer, the heat and humidity wasn't

that much but we did have those scorching days. but for some reason we are havng rains and chilly weather....it should get cold but

not at this early in the season....its not even holloween yet.

 

as we await better weather, i myself am waiting...longing...actually even praying for what i need. i need  a break, even a miracle so that

my work papers will get processed here instead of my home country....its not hte processing that is taking long, i have no other recourse

that since the date is fixed for filing your application...i just dont want to happen to me what happened the last time.....missing the filing date by 2 days...i've waited years for this break to come and then i miss it by 2 days. oh well, the job is still here, its just that i would want to stay here and wait for it here instead of back home. not that i dont miss my family, i do. i just dont want to go through the red tape and hustle of doing interviews in an embassy there...well so much for that, i have done my part and have eshausted all options, i am just waiting...counting the months into weeks and weeks into days.....i hope things get favourable....based on my recent luck with things like these, i do get it but always at the nick of time....i am hoping for the best.

 

i hope the weather clears up by next week...i do like this kind of weather...its not too cold and definitely its not warm or hot.....the leaves are starting to fall....some are turning brown or losing the bright green colour...chilly nights and shorter nights....Fall will be upon us soon.

 

later.

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emotions

i believe that your own emotions are also affected by people close to you or those you are in constant contact.

it is hard enough to be away from your family, specially if you are 8500 miles away but living with other people makes it even harder. i thinking living alone would be better. but you have to make choices and have to make do with what you are dealt with.

you think you know a person since you have been his or her acquaintance for the last 25 yrs, but mate, unless you have lived under the same roof with them, you can never say that you know them. you will get to know their quirks and idiosyncrasies faster than anything. since coming here to the US, i have lived with two families, the first one well, they have issues and you sort of get in caught in between. you don't really know where to place yourself specially when father and daughter start arguing...you just lock yourself inside your room and try to block out the things you hear. and the feeling of being restricted in your movement, i have never felt so trapped or deprived of freedom in my whole life, ...but its their house (i would be kidding myself if i call it a home) so its their rules...my mate who lives in another part of the house has his own set of rules....i just have to live with that and try to make sense of things and keep myself healthy.... the hard part is you also feel like a prisoner since i don't have my own car...so i go with the flow and where it takes me....its a good thing i was able to get out of there...it just adds to the loneliness that i experience....so i moved to another mate of mine...and i reckon i will have more freedom and be happier...i was dead wrong...this bloke has issues as well...for a someone who is expecting his family to arrive and settle here after 4 years, he seems not a happy camper....and man...he has depression and sadness written all over him...like he has this dark cloud over him....he refuses to pick-up after himself....fair dincum, the hardest part is that sadness is being passed on to me....he is so gloomy and it just makes me feel like not getting up in the morning.

i try my best to talk to him and bring out happier feelings, but mate, its like this bloke has just given up, he hates his work, and the situation he is in, but like i always tell him, you make your own decisions and you yourself decide what makes you happy. it is not enough you complain or vent that you hate your job...mate you have to do something about it.

for now, i am trying to stay put....but i am looking at my options....i would rather live alone in solitude than live with blokes likes this, they just bring down my spirits, its their choice to live like that and i have to make my own.

---

MY FRIENDS

Friends....Isn't it nice to have friends...I wouldn't know what to do without them. But the thing with friends....Is like they are any other thing in this world, they are either a boon or a bane in one's existence.

I treasure friends who have stayed with you through thick and thin, who have been with you in your most happiest times and your lowest times. But there are some friends who fall in the cracks in between.

there are those that you think you know, but given a particular situation or event or instance you find out their true colour or personality. The saying, you really wouldn't know a person till you have lived with them is so true.....I have proven this first hand, I have a mate who I consider a very close friend on mine, someone who is like a brother to me, ...Well until I had the chance to be with him all day everyday, day in day out.....funny thing is even with all his quirks you just can't hate the bloke, you try and do your best to give him advice and let him know his quirks without hurting his feelings....But you can only do so much and just forget it later on....

suffering in silence with the slurping sounds he makes while drinking coffee or the loud chewing sound he makes while eating his food, the sexual remarks he makes like he is sexually deprived and the constant picking of one's nose...How can you pick your nose that long, that often...My god!....To be able to put in 3/4ths of your index finger in your nose trying to pick a booger is an amasing feat....that alone will keep your mouth agape....But anyway, he is a good reliable friend you can depend on....regardless

while some friends are highly-opinionated on certain things that they seem to be an expert on all things....you can't give your opinion on things with this guy...he thinks he knows it all based on what he has experienced or a variation of his experience. how could everybody else follow what he has done when his case or scenario is not that common....my point here is you can't make your experiences in live as gospel truth for others to follow.....they make be come a basis for consideration ot parallelism but never as a template of another one's success....

others are so profound that they need or have a need to explain or find an explanation for everything.....like why in the world do you have to seat down and go through a movie plot with a fine tooth comb........this friend of mine even discerns the idea of why or how cars talk in an animated movie......or every detail in aperiod film.....give me a bloody break....take the movie for what it is, an entertainment medium......let yourself go and see the movie to be entertained and not as a critic....this guy is like the ralph nader of everything.....he has comments on every marketing or sales pitch that there is in the market or that this plan doesnt save you anything or that I dont need this much for this service since I will only use it this much.....for crying out loud, this guy is the only person I know who will actually read even the fine print on a fortune cookie or a ceral box......he has an explanation and justification for everything. The bad effects of red meat and pork and fried food and salt.....that fish and veggies are good and that a bottle of beer a day is good ....But this is from the same guy who doesnt cook and only eats canned fish and sardines all the time.....raw veggies or fish and veggies froma chinese restaurant ( do I hear MSG?) and the beer is consumed before having dinner.....explain the health benefits of that to me.....BUT again....he has his good traits...he is very thorough and understands most things and researches most things and he can explain to you stuff in clear manner.

one other is so engrossed in gadgets that he has everythig for everything, he spend so much on this stuff and rarely uses them, he is such a procrastinator that is why he ends up cramming most of the time.....Well, maybe that's how he gets his kicks....But you can only do so much in an hour....and you cant cram everything in that short period of time.

and yet there is the one that always stands out int he group...I think every group fo friends has a guy like this...The one who thinks he is God's gift to woman and mankind.....The one who always has the last word in every conversation, the one who always cracks the jokes and is the life of the party....The one who is always trendy and have tried the latest on anything....The one who knows about every topic and yet is the ugliest in your group....hahahaha this one kills me as I watch him keep up witht he jones'

some of them are just plain whiners....whine, whine whine but they don't do nothing to help themselves.

and the girls in my circle....this is one thing I dont understand about them...they are all pretty and intelligent but they are by far the dumbest people I know when it comes to relationships.....its as if they didnt pick up anything while being with us for the last 10 yrs or so.....these friends of mine are such lookers but I have always wondered why they get these ugly guys as their boyfriends......it escapes me, really.

I myself am not perfect, I have my flaws. But this group of guys that I have mentioned...Well we have known each other for the past 27 years....that should account for something right.....like my saying goes; I may rant and rave but these are just my observations and opinions..no matter what their character flaws are....I will trust them with my life.

so much for friends....I love these guys.

just concluded NBA Finals 06

well, i wrote about this before...but its a different finals altogether.
....what a series!!!....although i was a bit disappointed my team
wasn't in it,...a a pistons fan....it still was a great one.... I'm
not particularly fond of Miami and shaq...never liked shaq since he
already has an advantage since he is THAT big...obviously he will be
dominating...but going to the normal guys....dwayne wade is one
spectacular player...shows you glimpses of michael jordan and james
worthy....but he did get a lot of help from the officials.....oh,
come on...admit it...he did....all superstars do.....its just the
hidden rule in the NBA....continuity play for the superstars....all
of them get it....kobe, shaq, lebron...magic in his time, jordan and
bird, even dr.j got it......but that is another topic for discussion....
the heat played great......they deserve the championship....specially
for alonzo mourning....he played a marvellous game...5 blocked
shots...crucial mavs shots....he was awesome...that alone deserves a
championship ring outright.....gary payton.....great career in
seattle but never found a supporting cast till he joined the
heat.....key plays through out the series has earned him his
ring...something he will cherish for a long time......
as for the mavs.....i like the team and actually rooted for
them.....i like the underdog in any competition...they showed
heart....but they need more maturity and a damn good centre in order
to succeed.....they are not sure that they can make it back to the
conference finals...what with the spurs and suns preparing for
them....the clippers maturing and all.....they would have probably
made it if they had michael finley....maybe....
it was a great finals....mavs have the whole summer to rethink and
regroup...avery johnson is a very good coach...he will become a
legend in the NBA......see you all in November......I LOVE THIS GAME!

its summer time

it's officially summer....and guess what....it's bloody raining.....well it was pretty hot outside this afternoon....it started to drizzle in the morning....quite gloomy actually....didnt see how the early part of the day was since i was cooped up in my room doing lots of stuff...only time i was able to see daylight was when i stepped out for a smoke......and that 10 minutes of sunshine was enough for me.

...getting home in the afternoon, was such a hassle since the drive was towards the sun.....summertime here means having sunshine till 7:30pm....that is due to daylight savings time.....by 9pm it was already dark....and rain was pouring a bit...now its just some lighting storms.

.... i love watching lightning storms specially the ones over the sea.... i used to sit by the window of my room when i was i darwin....just watching the skies get torn up by those huge white
streaks of light...

oh well, tomorrow is another day, and they say its going to be a lot better than today.....nice thing about summer is you get to dress casually....i do mostly in shorts...and so do most of the women out about town......hmmmm, what is a nice place to visit over a long weekend....can't wait for the 4th of july weekend......am looking forward to that vacation.

cheers

human nature

what makes people do the things that they do, is it really human nature,

attitude or just plain stubbornes?

why is it so difficult to give advice to other people, specially to friends.

is it the way you say it or the way they accept it?

why can some people change and others cannot, citing the reason that they have

been doing that for as long as they can remember.

 

are we really creatures of nature and habit.

we do things a certain way because we want to right, can our own choices impede our

growth as a person, can a stern and disciplinarian father totally change the outcome of the

lives of his children and make them clones of himself just because he does things his way.

 

is this reality the thing that feeds the way things are marketed to us?

what makes us go against the things that we were thought? we know good from bad,

but why is it that there are so many people in prisons? you can reason out that most of them

are uneducated that's why they are in jail, what about the techno criminals or the corporate thieves.

these are all well educated people? is it really in you...the bad gene i mean, that makes you decide

to steal or cheat? is it really human nature to fall on the wrong side?

 

makes you wonder, with so many years of education and advices from both the school and your parents

still some people choose the wrong path. and no one is exempted from it. even the man of the cloth as they say.

 

is it because we are mere mortals and that we are created that way.

 

just my thoughts
--
Read the bible.....it will scare the hell out of  you....

a new challenge for the new year

time sure flies fast. i've been here almost 2 months now enjoying the company of long lost friends.

 

the weather is wrecking havoc on my body system, bloody freezing outdoors and warm in doors, actually dry air

indoors, different buildings, different heater and humidifier settings.

 

i love the open road out here in the suburbs, but i do miss the city noise once in a while.

i spent the first half of the last day of the year in manhattan, it was great. it was snowing and there was no traffic

or no crowds, well it was 8:30 in the morning. but there was a long queue at the empire state building, bloody tourists.

 

i am putting myself to the challenge for the coming year, i know i can make this happen.

like what they say in that song about new york,...."if you can make it here, you can make it anywhere"

 

happy new year to everyone!
--
Read the bible.....it will scare the hell out of  you....